In Retrospect of Random Sports Month

So Random Sports Month turned out to be a little bit more than a month, but I got to do some pretty sweet stuff: shoot a gun, play dodgeball, lose horribly at at beer pong, rock climb, and trapeze.  As always there’s so much more I wanted to do and skydiving is still very much on the list.  It’s always so hard to find the time.

Speaking of time… I just got a huge promotion at work which is going to take up the majority of my time for the rest of the year.  But fear not, America.  I’ll see you all in 2013. 🙂

September 24 – Flying Trapeze

So, I finished off random sports month with the most random sport I could think of – trapeze.  I bought a Living Social deal for an Intro To Low Fly Trapeze Workshop by AWOL Dance Collective (

I arrived at the warehouse, which is shared with a very open, very dangerous looking woodworking shop.  I had to follow a long and windy semi-enclosed pathway to the restroom.  There were huge power tools with unfinished projects sitting all over the place.  There was a carnival sign hanging from an overhead rafter.  There were piles of wood and sharp objects everywhere.  Just to give you an idea of how loose these guys play with safety, this is where I washed my hands.


The class started and it was awesome.  Just a bunch of girls in their 20s looking for a different kind of workout or just looking to try something new. We started with a warm up and some yoga to get flexible.  Then, they lowered the trapeze bars and we all took turns kicking our legs up and underneath them to swing upside down.  The bar was pretty high and the first time I tried to kick my legs up gracefully, I wound up falling short.  Really short.  Well, I wasn’t gonna let that happen again, oh no.  The next time I tried, I kicked the shit outta that bar.  Like, kicked it so hard it left huge welts which later became huge bruises on both my shins.  I got you this time, BAR!

After we did a few upside down tricks, we started swinging.  We pulled the bar all the way back and practiced control swinging.  This was my favorite part.  The pictures did not turn out awesome, but I’m still gonna share them.



Then, we learned ribbons.  I always thought these were so beautiful and graceful.  Turns out they are very smelly, actually.  And really freaking hard.  I was never one of the people that could climb the rope in gym class, so I didn’t really think this would be any better.  In fact, I was in the 30% or so that actually got off the ground.  Not very far off the ground, mind you, but off the ground nonetheless.  Booyah.

Here’s my teacher showing off.


A friend and I went back to see a live show in November and it was crazy awesome.  I would recommend it to anyone.  It’s really cheap and really entertaining.

September 12 – Hot Yoga

I’ve had a Groupon to do hot yoga for a few months (um, I guess since yoga month, naturally.)  I finally got to use it today.  It is for 10 classes, but I have to take them all within 3 weeks (spoiler alert: probably not gonna happen.)

The class was held at Hot Yoga For Life and they have two locations in the Portland area.  It was already pretty hot outside but when I walked into the studio, I was instantly sweaty.  It wasn’t sauna-like as I had imagined.  Just hot.  Effing hot, to be exact.  My feet and hands were slipping all over my yoga mat and I noticed the more seasoned hot yoga-ites brought large beach towels to drape over their slippery mats.  Next time, Abbie, remember to bring a beach towel (additional spoiler alert: probably not gonna happen.)

So, in summation, if you like heat and yoga then it’s for you.  If you like neither, steer clear silly.

September 10 – Dodgeball

A good friend is a kickball/dodgeball fanatic.  He plays on several teams all year long.  He invited me to a pickup game tonight.  It was mainly people from the Recess Time League who were there to practice before the new dodgeball season really started.  I was the only one who was playing for the first time (since grade school.)

OMG, who knew there were so many rules?!  There were several times that I thought I was out but my team all yelled at me to stay in.  Okay, sure.  But… uh… why?  Apparently, if someone catches the ball after it hits you, you aren’t out.  If the person who threw the ball that hit you gets out before the ball hits you, you aren’t out.  If you block the ball with another ball, but it still hits you, you aren’t out.  This may lead you to believe that I spent a lot of time not being out.  Au contraire mon fraire.  I spent A LOT of time being out.

It’s really hard to try to hit someone without making it extremely easy for them to catch the ball and get you out.  I got my balls caught a lot (that’s what he said.)  I got hit with balls a lot (that’s what she said.)  And I even took a ball to the face (no joking, this is serious.)  I was looking right, and smack from the left came a dodgeball squarely on my face and neck.  My ear starting ringing and my eyes got blurry.  Some guy comes over to me and shakes my hand and apologizes for pegging me.  No problem, dude.  But why are there two of you?  I am still bummed I don’t have this on video.

So I got about 3 or 4 people out, and one of them was a really good player.  I caught a ball and got someone out while getting to bring another player on my team back in.  I am really sucky at throwing and kept getting my balls caught and got a bit frustrated.  When we left, my friend tells me that I did really good… for my first time… for a girl.  Fuck yeah.

August 27 – Bouldering II

Katie and I have squandered the first week of our two week membership to the Circuit Gym.  We go today after work to see what I can do if I don’t play racquetball immediately prior.  I am definitely better, but it’s still one of the hardest things I’ve ever physically done.  The upper body strength necessary to maneuver is admittedly much more than I currently possess.

That said, it is still crazy fun.  When you do get to the top and make it all the way over, you definitely get a feeling of instant gratification.  I made it over this wall.  I pushed myself higher (literally, get it?)  I landed on my feet and I am still in one piece.  I am tired and drained and my arms feel like they might fall off, and my fingers feel like they are dragging on the ground behind me, and I’m scared because I could’ve fallen.  But I didn’t.  And it’s awesome.

Afterward, we rewarded ourselves for a job well done with some Vietnamese food and cocktails at Luc Lac.  I love working hard!

August 24 – Shooting Range

Shooting a gun was on my OG list of things I wanted to do, so I am *so* glad I got to do it this month.  I took my very dear friend, Burris, who is also extremely into guns.  Coincidence?  We went to the Beavercreek Armory in Hillsboro and they were phenomenal from the very beginning.  We watched an informative video and took a short quiz and ordered our gear… okay, well Burris ordered our gear.

He said I could practice on a .22 but I should at least try to shoot a 9 millimeter.  He ordered a total of 8 boxes of ammo and several targets.  We rented the two guns and one lane to share.

We put on the fashionable eye and ear protection and get to our lane.  Burris shows me even more safety techniques and shoots a few times to let me see the process.  This is the first time I realize that I have never even been this close to an actual shooting firearm.  I am a little nervous and hesitant to hold this extremely powerful and deadly weapon.  I started off with the .22 and Burris and I took turns shooting and reloading.

Then, he let me unload an entire box of ammo (about 50) into my own target to see how I was doing.  Every single shot made it onto the target and the majority made it into the inner circle.  I told my mom all that time playing Duck Hunt would pay off someday.

So, then I moved on to the 9 millimeter.  A Glock.  Admittedly, I feel a little bit like Scully right now.  The kick on this weapon made me audibly squeal, and then laugh out loud.  It was extremely surprising, but awesome.

By the end of the two hours, my hands were sore from controlling the weapons and my fingers were raw from reloading the clips.  But I learned so much and feel like I could handle a weapon safely, even though I don’t think I’ll ever own one.  Ever.

Also, I think I need to say again how awesome the people at Beavercreek Armory were.  They made my first experience incredibly awesome and if you want to shootemup, go see them.

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August 23rd – Beer Pong?

Okay, so maybe Beer Pong is a sport.  And maybe I played it for a little while.  But I definitely don’t remember it.  The problem with drinking games is if you are not very good at them in the beginning, there is absolutely no learning curve.  Which means, if you start to play and suck, you are just going to get drunkier and drunkier until you don’t remember what you were doing.  So, before I played Beer Pong, I partook in some classic party-style Jenga with important tasks to complete after every brick you pull (including but not limited to, switching shirts with the player to your left and arm-wrestling anyone of your choosing.)  Needless to say, by the time beer pong rolled around… I wasn’t paying attention anymore.

I love barbecues.


August 21 – Bouldering

Me Oh My!  Two random sports activities in one day?!  Yes, I am that hardcore.  Bought a Groupon for an Intro to Bouldering class at the Circuit Gym.  It came with a two week membership for two.  Bouldering is a lot like rock climbing except you are not harnessed in and it is not necessarily about getting to the top, but how you get there.

I went with Katie to the class at 7.  It was taught by this super-fit hippie/stoner/skateboarder/climber named Shane.  He was crazy informative and I learned the names of holds and different ways of climbing.  So, now I can say things like, “you should match your foot and grab that juggy shelf.”  I know how impressive that sounds.

We went up a couple times with varying difficulty.  It starts with B for beginner, then zero all the way to 9.  I could not get up the 1 level.  It is freakin’ hard.  And also, my arms were like jello from playing racquetball for two hours earlier today.  Can’t you tell I’m a great planner.

Anyhoo… here are some pictures!

August 21 – Racquetball

Yay!  My first real random sports experience!  I’ve played racquetball a few times, but didn’t really understand the rules and didn’t really like it.  I played tennis a bit when I was younger, but always thought racquetball seemed like a lot of fun.

I got a friend who is very good at it to show me how, teach me the rules, and give me pointers.  After driving to a gym that didn’t have a racquetball court (whoopsie,) we finally found an appropriately amenity-equipped one and rented it for an hour and half.  It was so fun, we played for almost a full two hours.  I started getting better and it was just getting fun.  It is such a phenomenal workout and I was sweaty and smiling at the end.